How To Not Freak Out When You've Been Diagnosed With Breast Cancer
Posted On 10-13-2008 , 12:12 PM
How to Not Freak Out When You’re Diagnosed with Breast Cancer
I did, but it was a delayed reaction. Being told that you have breast cancer can be very traumatic. If you’ve been diagnosed with breast cancer, I’m hoping that I can help you by sharing my story and some of the things that helped me through the experience.
I was diagnosed with “invasive ductal carcinoma” and “ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS)” on October 3, 2006 – a day that I will never forget.
I routinely had a mammogram every year and dreaded it every time. Without fail, I’d be called back in for another one because the radiologist “…saw something”. So I got accustomed to several mammograms a year. Then, one time it was suggested that I have a “diagnostic lumpectomy” because the radiologist said “hmmm, this doesn’t look good.” At first, I was shocked that she said that out loud and then, I freaked out.
To make a long story short the biopsy was negative for malignancy and I was told to keep an eye on it. Waiting for the results was awful. I feared that the news would not be good, especially after the doctor’s comments.
The next mammogram – same thing – called back a few times for a repeat. I was used to this now by now and the radiologist gave me the report recommending a biopsy to “rule out malignancy”. Here we go again. I had a stereotactic biopsy and really expected the same good news.
I went out of town to visit my best friend and got “the call”. I was very friendly with my doctor and her staff so when she said “….we’d like you to come in to see us to talk about your biopsy” I thought - uh oh. I was certain this wasn’t a social phone call and told them to be direct with me. So, that’s how I got the “you have breast cancer” news.
I didn’t freak out, maybe because I was sort of expecting this to happen at some point. I spent the rest of that week reading about breast cancer and thinking. Then it was time to go home and that’s when I freaked out. I was going home and knew what I had to do.
In hindsight, I’m grateful that I was out of town. It gave me time to get my thoughts together before breaking the news to my husband and kids.
I had to have a mastectomy – the cancer was in numerous places in my right breast. I chose to have a bilateral mastectomy however, because of the problems I had with the other breast. My mother died the same day as my mastectomy – 10 minutes after I was brought into the recovery room. We know she hung on until she heard that I came out of surgery.
Chemotherapy started a few weeks later. My hair started to fall out December 30th. Happy New Year, huh?
So, here are a few things I want to pass on from my experience:
Keep Records
Get a binder and request copies of all reports from the various doctors and labs. You’ll want them for reference. Doctors and labs are happy to give copies to you.
Keep a Journal
It helps to express your emotions on paper. Many women keep a journal of their experiences to refer to later and help them cope with their feelings.
Read, Read, Read
There is a lot of information out there on breast cancer. You may want to read about all of the different treatment options .You may also want to learn what some of the technical words are that your doctors are throwing at you and/or be able to interpret reports and lab results. I personally like “Breast Book” by Dr. Susan Love. Everything you need to know is all in one book. The New York Times calls it the “bible” for women who have breast cancer. Dr Love is also a huge proponent for finding a cure
Join a Support Group
I did not do this in the beginning and regretted it later. You’ll find women who are going through, or have been through, similar experiences. It can be of enormous help to you. There are also support groups on the internet.
Seek Professional Advice if Necessary
Psychotherapy can be a tremendous tool during this difficult time. Don’t be afraid to seek counsel; we all deal with emotional healing differently. A professional can help guide you through the tough times.
Accept Help from Friends
Your friends are devastated too. You’re helping them by opening up to them which in return, helps you. Let them cook for you, clean for you or whatever they want to do. Plus you may feel crummy sometimes and need the help.
Screw the Wig
Some women choose to wear a wig if you lose your hair. I didn’t. I bought one when I started losing my hair. It was a nice wig, but I hated it and never wore it once – it felt like my head was being squeezed by a vise. I chose to wear colorful scarves and baseball caps. It amused me that I could get ready to go somewhere in record time because I didn’t have to deal with the hair routine!
I Made it!!!
Susan G Komen
Race for the Cure
Support the Cause for a Cure
Sometimes the need to “give back” and find a positive side to the breast cancer experience can be channeled by helping other women with breast cancer. I joined an organization called “Survivors Offering Support”. Different areas of the country have different organizations. This coming weekend I’ll be participating in the Susan G Komen Race for the Cure. It is an absolutely amazing experience. There’s a sea of pink and white t shirts – pink if you’re a survivor, white if you’re just supporting the cause. To me, seeing thousands of fellow survivors is very powerful.
Support the Cause for a Cure
Sometimes the need to “give back” and find a positive side to the breast cancer experience can be channeled by helping other women with breast cancer. I joined an organization called “Survivors Offering Support”. Different areas of the country have different organizations. This coming weekend I’ll be participating in the Susan G Komen Race for the Cure. It is an absolutely amazing experience. There’s a sea of pink and white t shirts – pink if you’re a survivor, white if you’re just supporting the cause. To me, seeing thousands of fellow survivors is very powerful.
Stay Positive
It can be hard sometimes, but a positive attitude will get you through the tough moments. Picture yourself healthy again.
So, these are some of the things that helped me freak out a little less after being diagnosed. Having breast cancer changed my life for the better. You learn to appreciate things that you always took for granted. You’ll find that you re-evaluate your life too. Sounds cliché and a bit crazy, but it’s true. Many fellow survivors say the same thing.
because the radiologist “…saw something”. So I got accustomed to several mammograms a year. Then, one time it was suggested that I have a “diagnostic lumpectomy” because the radiologist said “hmmm, this doesn’t look good.” At first, I was shocked that she said that out loud and then, I freaked out.
